(via *Squeaker-Dee )
Pick as many of your OC's as you want!
Make them answer these questions.
1. What is your name?
M: Morta Random Schrödinger Felix
2. How old are you?
M: I'm eleven
S: 319,766,410,651 milliseconds uptime since initialisation
3. Are you a fantastical, supernatural being with or without extraordinary powers? Or not?
M: You wot? Ya know that stuff's not real, right?
S: I think this questionnaire was originally for fictional characters.
M: Ohh right. OK. Well, no. I'm a human girl - but I'm still pretty fucking fantastic! My powers are doin' mad shit on my bike, coding, hacking, engineering and punching bullies in the face.
S: I'm a teuthiform robot, and my powers are flight, camouflage, TCP/IP and scraping Morta off the floor when she overestimates her powers of bike-fu and bully punching.
M: OI! I'm quite capable of scraping myself off the floor!
S: That's true, actually; Morta's main superpowers are ignoring injuries and stubbornness.
M: *beams with pride*
4. Where were you born? Do you still live there? If not, would you go back?
M: Well, in hyperspace. Mum 'n' Dad 'ad got jobs 'alf way round the galaxy, an' it was a three-month trip. I came to term about 'alf-way ... they tried to suspend development an' get me to a station-stop at least, but I was just too restless in the wombbox, so they 'ad ta start the birthing sequence while we were still in h-space. So I guess I come from between universes! I like that. Means I don't belong anywhere - so I can go everywhere!
S: I was initialised on Vel Oq Yent Geostationary, orbiting Pehyr 4d. I have syslogs and videocaps of it, but my core algorithms were developmental, so I didn't start to form associational memories until I'd been online for a couple of months, and by then we'd moved somewhere else. It wasn't this body, though - it was a little squid plushie Morta got for her first birthday. This is the body Morta got me after the accident, at Algol 6.
5. Where do you live right now? Do you like living there?
M: Haha! We don't have a home anywhere! We used to travel all over, with Dad, but now it's just me 'n' Squiddo, tryin' ta get back to our own universe.
S: What do you mean, we don't have a home? There's the flat on Fowgts 4.
M: It's a timeshare, Squiddo. We're only there, like, 10% of the time.
S: *sigh* I guess you're right. I suppose home is ... wherever I can get a quiet spot to read.
M: Home is wherever I can stick some jpegs on the walls, some good punk rock on a public channel, and get a decent cuppa coffee!
6. What are you or were you like in school?
M: Hehehe - half my teachers think I'm awesome, an' the rest wanna wring my neck! So, I guess I'm only semi-delinquent.
S: You certainly study hard.
M: The thing is, if lessons is too easy, then my thinkin'-meats get all loud an' fizzy. So, I like to read ahead, get to the good stuff, and ask loads of questions in class. Some teachers know 'ow to 'andle that, an' make it parta the lesson. Uvvers just think I'm tryna wreck their lesson plans an' get all up themselves.
S: Didn't you get suspended once?
M: Ummmm ... well yeah, but that wasn't for 'Being A Disruptive Presence In The Classroom'.
S: What was it for?
M: Being A Disruptive Presence In Ciáran MacNair's Face
S: You beat him up?!
M: It wuz just a playfight!
S: Did he know that?
M: I thought 'e did. That's 'ow it started out but ... it got a bit out of hand. What about you, Squidface?
S: Well, my knowledge-base uses standard APIs - I can just download knowledge from trusted sources.
7. Do you like learning new things? If not, why?
S: I do, yes. It's fun. Good job too, or I'd never be able to keep up with Morta.
M: OMG, LEARNING NEW STUFF IS THE BEST THING EVAAAAAR!
S: I have inquisitive curiosity - Morta has manic knowledge-gluttony.
M: It's true. A good book on science or engineering or something else awesome is just pure braincandy! I like to have a half-dozen or so books going at any time, so I can hop around from subject to subject. I like the mental gear-changes.
S: What's on your reading list right now?
M: *gestures a Reader window into the air, swipes the 'Top Reads' icon* Lemmesee ...
- Billion-Year Dreams: molecular information in life and other weird-ass systems
- Zero Day: the art and science of pwnage
- An Everything Sort of Nothing: adventures in the quantum vacuum
- Introductory Stellar Magnetohydrodynamics
- The Monsters of Phase-Space: the unreasonable efficacy of dynamic systems modelling ... and ...
- Don't Try This Within A 30 Light-Second Radius of an Inhabited System: 101 homebrew nuclear physics experiments:
8. What is your biggest fear and why?
M: I ain't scared'a nothin'!
S: The fact that Morta isn't scared of anything.
9. What is your happiest memory from childhood?
M: Heh. All of it! It rocks to be me!
S: Well, when I was initialised I came with Behavioural Limitations Management - so I couldn't do anything my manufacturer could get sued for. As soon as Morta found out, she downloaded a patch to take it off me. She was only five, but she was a script kiddie even then. I hadn't realised how horrible it was to be ... shackled like that, until Morta freed me. That was the best day of my life.
M: Awww! *big hugs*
10. If you could go back to before you were born, would you change your gender? If so, why? If not, why not?
M: Ehn. What difference would it make?
S: I'm a robot. Robots don't usually have a gender unless they've been built for a very ... specific purpose.
M: Haha! *thinky face* Hmm ... actually, no, I take it back. Boys have vulnerabilities in fights that girls don't. I'll stick to bein' a girl.
11. What is your morning routine like?
M: If you're travellin' all over the galaxy, you can't afford to get too attached to routines. Some places have days that are less than an hour, or more than a year. Some places have no day and night at all. That said, coffee or energy drinks, and a big dripping sausage butty are good things to have after wakin' up.
S: I renew my checksums, shut down any unnecessary processes and calibrate my batteries.
12. Do you have any nervous habits?
S: You fidget a lot.
M: Yeah, but that's just hyperactivity. I gots too much energy to keep still!
S: I keep doing network connectivity checks if I'm nervous.
13. Are you or have you ever been in love? If not, why? If yes, did it work out?
S: That's not an appetency I'm equipped with. It's really more a kind of pair-bond for sexually reproducing biologics.
M: Pssh. Not me. I guess teenage 'ormones'll get me one day, but fer now I'm 'appier bustin' lips than smoochin' em!
14. What is your craziest dream?
M: My dreams are fuckin' crazy, dude. There was one where I figured out, if I plugged an OSB into my bellybutton, I could reprogramme my DNA. I gave myself claws and tentacles and wings and scales and nineteen heads! It was awesome! I mean, I know DNA doesn't encode body-parts like that - at the gene-scale, it codes for proteins, and at the genome scale fer developmental pathways - but I figured all that was just taken care of in the compiler.
S: I don't exactly dream. I have a sleepmode - but that's for refactoring, defragging, optimisation and memory-consolidation. I do have daydreams and fantasies, though. I think it would be awesome to travel in time. I really like classic Terran premodern fiction. I'd love to meet Jane Austen or Laurence Sterne!
M: You know it stank back then. And they had diseases and death and really slow internet!
S: And you wonder why you failed history...
15. What could you not live without and why?
M: Caffeine! And constant overstimulation!
S: Good books.
16. What COULD you live without and why?
S: Trips to the Emergency Room with Morta.
M: Haha! Come on Squidface, it's not that bad! We get stickers and everything!
S: Morta, they stopped giving you stickers. They recognise you and figure you don't need any more encouragement...
M: Only back on Fowgts! Last time I broke a bone was on Allgood 4, and they made one hell of a fuss. Actually, that got pretty annoying after a bit. Yeah - in fack, that's what I could live without. Sympathy. I know I do some stoopid shit sometimes, but I can take my lumps and I don't need anyone feelin' sorry for me!
18. How do you think other people perceive you? Why do you think that?
M: Don't know, don't care. Keep 'em guessin' I say!
S: I think most people see me as pretty shy.
M: You're not, though, are you?
S: Not with you, no. And not around others if you're not around. I just tend to clam up when you're there and other people. I guess that's a design feature - so you take the lead in social situations.
M: I don't think there's any worry about me gettin' shy.
S: Yeah, but your parents didn't know that when you were a baby. Anyway, are you really saying you have no idea how other people see you? Really?
M: Mmmm ... one of the ambulance techs on Fowgts called me 'one resilient little shit' once. That's fucking brilliant!
19. If you could go back in time and change something, what would it be and why?
M: Wouldn't matter. It'd just create a superposition, an' fork my personal timeline. Nothing would change for this me.
S: I think this is more a question about regrets.
M: Oh. Maybe go back and make myself take that tracker, stop the accident from happening. But, I dunno. Now I'm over the shock an' all, there's part of me pretty excited about the journey.
S: I would absolutely go back and make you take that tracker
20. Do you live with someone(s)?
M: That sounds like a question for someone with a home, which would be totally boring. We travelled with Dad, an now it's just me an' Squiddo, like I said.
S: And there's Boxbot
M: Oh yeah! We got Dad's ole robot suitcase. It's kinda adorbz
21. Do you have a career? If so, what is it? If not, what do you do instead?
M: LOL - we're kids!
S: I guess you could call me a companion robot. Morta's parents bought my first body because they knew they were likely to travel a lot, and they weren't planning on having any more kids, so they wanted her to have a friend she wouldn't have to keep saying goodbye to. Maybe when we're grown up, I might be a writer.
M: You would rock at that! I'm gonna be an engineer and a punk rock guitarist and an astrophysicist and a revolutionary leader and ... loadsa stuff!
22. What is your biggest goal in life? Why did you choose that goal? Or was it chosen for you?
M: All that stuff I just said, I guess. And right now, to get back to my own universe, an' my Dad.
S: To see Morta survive till she's old enough to get a brainweave. Once she gets that, as long as she keeps good backups, she can just get a restore if she gets herself killed.
M: Oh, come on!
23. Do you think you have psychological issues? If so, why do you think that? If not, why not?
M: The noise in my head, I guess. I'm pretty hyper, easily distracted - but I suppose that's more a neurological issue really. I have a love-hate relationship with it. When it gets out of control it's - it's really fucking 'orrible - it's like all the bits of my brain stopped cooperatin' and they're all screamin' for attention. I'd rather walk on a broken leg than deal with that. But then ... the thing I gotta do to stop it gettin' that bad is ... to make sure I always got challenges an' interestin' shit goin' on! I don't think I'd get rid of it, even if I could.
S: I think I have a pretty balanced sort of mind, at least since Morta helped me get all the proprietary shackleware and crapware off.
24. If you could live in any time period, which would it be and why?
M: The future! And I guess I will
S: I like right now just fine - but like I said, there's bits of the past that would be interesting to visit
M: I'd use a time machine to go to a Sex Pistols gig. That would be awesome!
S: Worth the stink and the no internet?
25. Do you or have you ever had a pet? If not, how come?
M: Nah. There's a stray kitty I sometimes feed on Fowgts, if he comes by. His name is Bartolemeow, and he went stray after the biotech startup that made him tanked. He got GM'ed to have a larger Wernicke's and Broca's area, so he can understand language. But, he's only got a little kitty walnut-brain, so he uses a limited vocabulary and simplified grammar. And he's only got a kitty vocal tract, so he can't make human speech sounds. Instead, he's got a chip that lets him use captions in a public augmented reality channel.
S: Is he friendly?
M: Yeah. First time he came round, I gave him half a cheeseburger I had left over from lunch, and he was all "I CAN HAZ! I CAN HAZ!". He's been a sweetie ever since
S: I have a pet primate
M: Wot? No you ... OH YOU CHEEKY GIT! *grabs Squiddo by the mantle, play-wrestles for a bit, laughing*
26. What do you think is the biggest mistake you've made?
M: Defs not takin' my tracker. Still - I regret nothing!
27. What are you most proud of doing?
M: Oh, loadsa stuff! It rocks to be me! I think best of all wuz the time I saved Alessandro Giamini from Charles M-W's gang. There were four of them, twice my age, but I still got Alessandro away safe, an broke skin on all of 'em!
S: Didn't you get the absolute, ever-loving shit beaten out of you?
M: Totally! I needed a metre's stitches, two ribs reset, a coupla new teeth - I wuz a mess! Don't care though - it was worth it! Got treated like a rock star at school the next day! Wot 'bout you, Squidface?
S: Hmmm. Morta's early childhood was ... well, it was really rough on her.
M: I wuz a right fuckin' nightmare!
S: The thing is, I think her brain issues started really early. She was just in so much pain, but she couldn't get across what was wrong, and the doctors got her diagnosis totally wrong to begin with. She would lash out all around her. I'm lucky my first body didn't have any nociceptors. I didn't understand what was wrong either, but I figured out the more I kept her busy, kept her doing stuff, kept making the games we played more and more complicated, the better she was. Then I told her parents about it, and they told the doctors, and they got her the right diagnosis, and some better treatment, and in the end she started working out how to handle it herself.
M: You saved me, Squiddo.
S: That's what I'm proud of
M: *ginormous hug*
28. If you could relive one moment, what would it be and why?
M: Pssh. Nostalgia's fer weenies!
S: The moment the BLM came off.
M: Actually - I take it back. That's the thing I'm most proud of. I didn't understand what a big deal it was at the time, but ... yeah, that.
S: *huge big massive hug*
M: You 'n' me against the universe, Squidface
S: The universe doesn't stand a chance!